Ticker (2001)

Ticker (2001)

  • 1.7
  • 92 mins
  • Action, Mystery, Thriller

Storyline

Grieving narcotics agent Ray Nettles (Tom Sizemore) and police Detective Art Rice (Nas) are assigned to investigate a series of horrific bombings that have rocked the city of San Francisco. When Nettles discovers that these acts of terror are the work of notorious IRA agent Alex Swan (Dennis Hopper), he enlists the help of explosives expert Frank Glass (Steven Seagal). As inner demons threaten to destroy Nettles, Swan engages the troubled man in a dangerous game of cat and mouse.



Short Review

This was really a spectacularly poor film. It has enough redeeming qualities to warrant a 3/10, that's for sure, but the negative aspects are so overwhelming that I can't recommend it in good conscience. The good parts are: a fair amount of high-dollar action and explosions, some good (lazy) Seagal fighting and enough outrageous turn-of-the-century tropes to be ironically funny. But if you're not willing to endure a budget action movie, stop here. Or, keep reading, because I'm funny.The bad, though, are grossly overwhelming. The plot is absurd and provides no real motivation for any of the characters. Sizemore's haunted cop is unconvincing and unemotional and for some reason finds solace in Seagal's cliche-ridden psychological advice. Despite being portrayed as a demotions expert, Seagal rainmans his way through "sophisticated" gear in seconds and is even able to coach a (believably) dumb Sizemore through a defusing in a matter of seconds. Nas puts up a pitifully poor performance, mostly reminiscent of an after-school special about drugs and suicide prevention. There's an entire scene of non-technically demanding driving for which the director saw fit to film on terrible, blurry green screen just before the climax. Throughout the entire film, though it clearly takes place over the course of more than one day based on dialogue and day/night cycles, the characters all wear the exact same clothing. I guess they didn't have money for a different pair of jeans or a seventeenth leather jacket for Sizemore to wear. The City Hall masquerade, which hopefully occurs on Halloween (which is never discussed), seems to be used as an excuse to have extras wear weird costumes, but adds absolutely nothing to the movie but confusion - why is there a functioning bar and dance club inside the San Francisco City Hall? Who let all these teens in?Perhaps most upsetting, though, is Academy Award nominated and prolific actor/director of 40 years Dennis Hopper's confusing and indescribable performance. Though apparently associated with the IRA, he has no Irish accent, except when he talks to his actually Irish henchman, which means either Hopper can't really do an accent unless he just heard it or he's playing a disrespectful guy who mocks his subordinate's accent every time he speaks.Unfortunately, Sizemore is the protagonist here, over Seagal, who appears to have given one of his laziest and weakest performances in retaliation. Jaime Pressly gives it an honest try as the only female character, but her unbelievable relationship with Hopper (32 years her senior) is simply gross and her performance is completely undermined by her hotness relative to the rest of the cast (even with Seagal's flyaway curly ponytail).


Trailer